So yesterday I had a panic, I really don’t know what came
over me as I have been feeling so in control but all of a sudden I just felt so
anxious and out of my depth. I haven’t
been feeling quite right the last couple of days and I was sitting with Riley
on the sofa and thought I had started having contractions… I guess it made me
realise it could happen at any time now and I just don’t feel ready. But do you ever feel ready?
I guess I have just been trying to keep such control over
the process and all of a sudden the reality that labour is completely out of
our control hit me. It will happen when
it happens and we’ll have to drop everything and just get on with it. After having had my little panic and then doing
some mindfulness I fell asleep and woke up in the night to realise it wasn't
the start of labour and everything could carry on as normal… for now!
I think last night made me realise this isn't going to be
easy and I need to work on my mindfulness more than ever now to keep some
control over my anxiety and not let it get on top of me. Let’s face it in a month the baby will be
here and we will hopefully all be home getting used to life with a new little
person in it. The process that gets us
there is out of my control so taking a deep breath and accepting things as they
happen seems like a good way to live life right now!
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