Learning to live with the new me...

Now this is going to sound strange… but as I am weaning off the Lamotrigine I am starting to feel different.  It was my sister who put things in perspective for me last week.  She asked how the med change was going and when I said OK but I feel like I am a bit moody some of the time.  She then said she thought I was much more like the old me, less zoned out and more aware of the world around me.

Then suddenly I could see it, what if this is what normal people are like, what if I have been so dosed up on Lamotrigine (which at the end of the day is a mood stabiliser) for the past 10 years that I have just been not quite experiencing the highs and lows of life.  Feeling a bit annoyed when people don’t seem to give a damn, being grumpy when I’m tired, getting frustrated… maybe that is all normal.

And all of a sudden I have realised I am think more, that probably sounds a bit crazy but if I am walking somewhere I find my thoughts are moving quicker.

All this increased mood and thinking is taking some getting used to, it makes me feel really tired by the evenings and I find it hard to put sentences together sometimes because I feel like I can’t keep up with my thoughts.  But I am feeling so much more alive, I think I just need to learn to order these increased thoughts and control some of my moody moments.

I just hope this is normal and not just that this fast thinking is a sign my brain is working overtime and it’s just a matter of time before I have a seizure…

But for now I am just going to enjoy being a little bit more alive :)

Me before I was diagnosed with epilepsy

Our adoption journey ~ another step forward

We got accepted to move forward with the adoption process!!!  Apparently about 50% of people get turned down at this point.  Now they are not saying my epilepsy won’t be a problem, not over that hurdle just yet but I don’t think they would be so enthusiastic for us to move forward if they thought it was going to be huge problem… anyway we will see.

I’m not going to be able to talk too much about the process I don’t think but I will put little updates along the way, it is an exciting journey but scary at the same time, there is a lot to consider.  I guess it’s a roller coaster a bit like our journey to parenthood biologically with Riley was.

Run or Dye...

I did it! I ran 5k without walking and without having a seizure.  It was very relaxed and just a lot of fun and I have to admit I am pretty proud of myself.  I did however suffer a little the next day and so because I have proved to myself my brain can cope with a 5k I am now going to start training properly and hopefully get back into this running thing, maybe even run the 2016 Marathon...  So here goes nothing… going to be doing the couch to 5k training programme for the next 9 weeks 

Finally a buggy with a dead break :)

So it's a bit late for me but finally a buggy manufacturer has done it... produced a buggy which has a dead break built in and the buggy looks fantastic.  Well done Phil and Ted's :)

Here's the key features:

• auto stop braking system: safe & convenient
• 26 riding options to accommodate 1 or 2 newborn babies up to 2 toddlers
• rear facing double kit option
• attach 1 or 2 car seats
• cleverly engineered 'kerb pop' for ultra light handling
• lightweight at just 12.5kg and 59cm narrow
• one hand fast fold & automatic frame lock
• easy adjust tail-free 5 point safety harness with shoulder pads for comfort
• multi height adjustable handle with comfort foam grip
• premium fabric
• deeper, taller & easily removed main seat
• seat back length: 64cm 
• multiple seat positions from lie flat for a newborn baby to fully upright
• follow-the-sun hood with handy storage pockets
• one hand double kit recline
• moldable neck support on double kit (sold separately) for a younger baby
• large shopping basket
• 12” air filled tyres
• durable & easy clean plastic footwell 
• 2-mode front wheel for multi terrain: swivel or lock straight

Here's the Phil and Ted's video... 

now I can see what they are getting at but checking your phone as you push your buggy towards a railway track or adjusting your sunglasses as you walk along a sea wall... seems like irresponsible parenting to me... sort of highlights that any parent can have an accident with their child and actually because we have epilepsy we are more aware of these risks and plan better...

Anyway I'm getting away from the point... this looks like a fantastic buggy and at £449 it isn't ridiculously expensive either compared to other buggies.

And here's the link to the online shop:

http://philandteds.com/uk/Buy/push/navigator-Buggy#.VC2u4PmwL-s